Absolute Trust

After she had given me some instructions for preparing myself and I had followed them, Lee looked me in the eyes and simply said "this time we go deeper". Of course I was thrilled and scared, but little did I know the depths she had intended.

A remote egg went inside me and was held there with latex panties. Matching bra and stockings and then opera length gloves over ordinary latex exam gloves as well. My favorite catsuit soon covered more of me. This one is a backzip with both gloves and feet attached. I've mentioned that I love layers so I was already enjoying myself. Lee wrapped my hands with black stretchy bondage tape (the kind that isn't sticky) making me feel a bit helpless, and she was just beginning.

The tube of the inflatable hood went between my teeth next, and the hood zipped and pumped up firm. I think these hoods looks rather silly, but with my eyes and ears covered with padding the tightness of the thing makes it quite effective.

My torso was wrapped next with layers of pallet wrap and cling film. She wrapped under my arms, then had me fold them beneath my breasts and wrapped them tightly to my body, continuing down to just above my knees. While I could still waddle about she led me to a low table and helped me to lie down where she finished the wrap over my legs and feet. This would have been about the most complete mummification I had experienced yet, but she wasn't done yet.

Under me, on the table Lee had her leather sleepsack. I had spent many nights in it back when she would loan it to a couple I used to play with, so I knew what she was doing as soon as I felt the zipper closing me in, though I could barely hear it. It has buckles too and of course she used them, and then secured the whole package to the table with straps as well, one of which was on my forehead keeping my head immobile.

Bondage is very close to sex for me, and I could feel the wetness spreading under the first layer. My sex was driving me crazy with an incredible desire for attention that I knew it wasn't going to get. I lay still for a while, and slowly began squirming, testing my very limited range of movement. Lee must have been watching me, at some point she turned on the egg that was deep within. At first I didn't know what it was, my mind a blur and my sex already a mass of over-excited nerve endings. I let out a gurgling moan when the vibrations hit me though, and I heard Lee faintly laughing somewhere outside of my tiny prison.

I came repeatedly then, waves hitting me over and over for what seemed like days, but probably was several minutes. The egg stopped for a little while and I caught my breath. It was just enough of a break for me to begin realizing the depth of trouble I was in, when she covered the tube that was my only source of air. There was no way I could safeword, even if I had wanted to, and Lee and I had agreed that we would no longer use them. For a few heartbeats I lay perfectly still. Then I tried to suck in air only to feel the hood pull down tighter over my face. Terror. I tried to jerk my head away, but the straps held me and all I could to was tremble. I could hear her voise then, telling me to lie still. When I did finally did the egg started up again inside me and the tube was opened. Cool air rushed into me as another orgasm struck, this one like a hammer to my midsection. I saw stars, whether from the rush of oxygen or the orgasm, or maybe both.

This pattern of deprivation, panic, the egg and her allowing me breath went on for some time. Lee later told me she'd never pushed a scene like this as far before. My life in her hands, with no way out except by her will. An extremely emotional, terrifying and dangerous place to be. All I know is when Lee at last finished unwrapping me my tummy felt like I had been punched and my loins were still having muscle spasms. My jaw hurt for hours, probably from biting on the plastic tube that had been between my teeth.

I lay on Lee's lap, still in latex, after that for awhile, drifting in peace, shaking now and then, tears being wiped away by the gentle fingers of my tormentor. Later we would talk into the night, sharing each other's company like only those that know and accept each other's dark secrets can.

The way you do...

I keep listening to the same CD over and over. I'm sure I'm not the only one that can find a meaning in a song. Something the songwriter says that just clicks into place and you say, wow, how did she know that it feels like that for me too. But this entire CD is haunting me. Especially a couple of songs. I'm talking about Devil Doll, or Colleen Duffy. The CD is The Return of Eve.

Nearly every word of her song The Way You Do I can apply to my relationship with Lee. The way she watches my eyes all through a scene, or even when we eat dinner together, Colleen seems to know about it. How Lee is on my mind all the time, again Colleen has been there. I don't need to mention how my body reacts with just the thought of Lee because she says it in the song. Let's get dressed up and make a mess? Anyone who knows me knows I have a fetish for latex. The lyric that begins with "my legs are crossed", well, I'm not getting into that too deeply.

Another song, this one titled Sweet Lorraine makes me cry. I can't figure out how my sister's life got into those song lyrics, but there it is.

Tortured is another one that sometimes brings tears. I think of someone I miss deeply in SL. I know it's not "real" but I still love her and miss her always.

With the decision yet to make with Lee, I keep hearing Lord's Prayer in my head. I'm not sure that is a good omen.

No, I still haven't decided whether or not I'll be a lost soul, or if I'll belong to someone else.